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Tag Archives: Pilgrims

Tony Funderburk Posted on November 24, 2022 by TonyNovember 24, 2022
Pass the turkey. This story's murky.

Scurvy, dead fish, and malnutrition. Happy Thanksgiving. Oh yeah, freezing cold death. Pass the turkey.

Hope you’re hungry. ‘Cause it’s Thanksgiving Day, here in America. So, it’s time to EAT. And as you do, let’s remember those people who started the tradition way back in the 1600’s. And, pilgrim, you better believe their celebration was a little less easy peasy than yours.

Hey, I said, “Pass the turkey!”

Anyway…

The Plymouth settlers arrived too late to plant crops and reap a harvest before winter. And, as a result, that first winter they lost over half of the original 102 passengers who landed there on the Mayflower. Yeah, they had to deal with the terrible effects of global warming 400 years ago. And that meant, you guessed it, a bitterly cold winter.

You’d think a winter like that would motivate the 44 survivors to head back to Europe at their first opportunity. But, according to records, not one of them returned when the Mayflower sailed back the following spring.

Hmm…they must have had stronger backbones back then.

Oh yeah, I mentioned dead fish earlier. Well, that was a reference to what one local “Indian,” named Squanto, taught the Pilgrims to use for fertilizer. When they did, they reaped a great crop of corn. Well, it wasn’t Green Giant corn, but it was still pretty darn good. Especially considering how close they had all come to freezing deaths.

“Hey, would somebody please pass the turkey for cryin’ out loud?”

Let’s see. Where was I? Oh yeah, eventually the Plymouth colony elected William Bradford to be their second governor. (the first one suffered one of those aforementioned freezing deaths) And Mr. Bradford did a good job. He was able to build a good relationship with the local natives.

By the following Autumn, the Pilgrims had a nice harvest. Nice enough, in fact, that they invited those local natives to help them celebrate an English tradition called “Harvest Festival.” And apparently they all dined on turkey (And I still don’t see any turkey heading my way, HELLO?), venison, duck, goose, fish, and even cornbread. Yeah, they all had plenty to be thankful for, and they made their “thanksgiving day” a yearly tradition.

Finally, President Lincoln declared Thanksgiving a national celebration in 1863.

The Plymouth Pilgrims celebrated their survival. Fortunately you and I didn’t barely survive the previous winter and year. We can get together just because we want to. And, sadly, more and more Americans take it all for granted. Many of them don’t have a clue how Thanksgiving Day even started.

But most importantly, the vast majority of them are clueless about Who we give thanks to. And, as a result, the winter of their discontent will be much longer and harsher. If you know someone like that, be a good Indian and share your bounty with them.

Happy Thanksgiving 2022. “And, once and for all, pass the turkey!”

Thank God I’m not alone on any day.
Thank God He gave His Son to be The Way
For me to live a life that never ends.
Thank God that He and I are best of friends.

Thank God for every moment you’re alive.
Thank God because, in Him, you can survive
The trials and tribulations when you say…
“Thank God for love,” on this Thanksgiving Day.

Stay tuned,

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Posted in Tony Funderburk | Tagged a matter of life and death, Pilgrims, Thanksgiving 2022, turkey

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